Why do people suffer from depression?
This question is probably one that even people with depression cannot answer correctly. In reality, depressed individuals do not feel depressed for no reason as people might think; it’s just that the “reasons” behind it are too painful to remember. However, the body does not forget. Depression and physical pain still serve as painful “expressions,” indicating that you have unmet needs. Just like plants need nutrients to thrive, humans also cannot grow without basic nourishment. When an individual’s basic needs are not met, experiencing feelings of depression is completely reasonable. In life, many people have unmet needs.
Some want to find better jobs
Some want their children to receive better education
Some long for love, care, and support
Some want to have more intimate friends
…
However, the results often involve being accused of asking for too much. Have you ever thought that sometimes it’s not that we ask for too much, but rather our basic needs are habitually overlooked and not fulfilled? One fact is, the inability to satisfy one’s basic needs can lead to depression.
Depression stems from unmet basic needs.
John Hari, a graduate of the University of Cambridge, is not only an outstanding journalist and the author of two bestselling books in The New York Times but also disclosed that he is a depression sufferer. In a TED talk, he called for a change in how depression and anxiety are understood and treated, emphasizing the importance of addressing needs and recognizing that mental health issues are not solely due to chemical imbalances. Through deep reflection and societal influences, we can discover more effective treatment methods. For example, exploring and delving into one’s inner self is actually a way to unlock constraints, fulfill certain needs, and desires. Abraham Maslow, a renowned American psychologist, proposed the famous hierarchy of needs theory, which to a certain extent reflects common laws of human psychological activities and behaviors. Maslow identified five different levels of needs within humans, which evolve from lower to higher levels, namely: physiological needs, safety needs, love and belongingness needs, esteem needs, and self-actualization needs. Physiological, safety, and love needs belong to the lower level, which can be met through external conditions, whereas esteem and self-actualization needs are considered higher-level needs that require internal factors for fulfillment. Generally, once a certain level of need is relatively satisfied, development towards a higher level occurs. At the same time, an individual may have several needs at once.
Moreover, each person has different requirements for needs. Many entrepreneurs or celebrities may seem to have everything – worth billions, rich, influential, and adored by many – yet they also have latent higher-level needs requiring fulfillment. Depression often arises because the pathway to fulfilling these higher-level needs is blocked! For instance, setbacks in love relationships or family breakdowns can lead to unfulfilled needs in the domain of love, while setbacks in careers can hinder the fulfillment of self-worth.
Many children nowadays experience depression at a young age. Why do they become depressed? Do we truly understand the needs of this generation of children? Parents often feel wronged, thinking they provide everything materially for their children, yet the children remain unsatisfied. Sometimes, what we impose on children is not what they truly desire – a mismatch between supply and demand. Do you think the children could be truly happy in such circumstances? What they mostly need is emotional fulfillment, respect, and the right to make their own choices, rather than just material possessions.
Therefore, oftentimes, the onset of depression is a signal implying that certain desires within have long gone unfulfilled. Delving into one’s real needs Dr. Samoffield, a psychiatrist from South Africa, once shared his experience: In 2001, while promoting antidepressants in Cambodia, he encountered a farmer working in the fields who unfortunately lost a leg due to a mine explosion. Although equipped with a prosthetic limb, the farmer could not continue working in the fields and spent his days in tears, eventually succumbing to depression. Dr. Samoffield recommended antidepressants, but after consulting with local doctors and villagers, they decided to purchase a cow for the farmer, enabling him to become a dairy farmer with a source of income. By raising cattle and producing dairy products, the farmer quickly found meaning and value in life. Within weeks, he stopped crying, and the symptoms of depression disappeared without the need for medication. Why could a cow cure the farmer’s depression? The reason is quite simple – the cow satisfied the farmer’s physical and psychological needs. Losing a leg and being unable to work on the land stripped him of basic life security, while the arrival of the cow allowed him to see his abilities and value anew, restoring his sense of control over life and self-esteem. Although antidepressants may be effective for some, solely relying on medication cannot address the root of the issue; treatment must be combined with societal factors.
Delving into one’s true needs requires deep introspection and exploration of oneself. This forms a crucial part of psychological counseling or therapy. Finding hidden needs allows for a more positive and rational perspective on issues and meets the needs of the inner self. Another important aspect is learning to accept. In an environment that cannot meet various needs, we are likely to experience pain, unrest, and distress. However, this does not imply mental unhealthiness; on the contrary, this discomfort is an expression of mental health, sensitivity to our needs and values. When you attempt to immediately alleviate pain and discomfort, you often get trapped in an emotional cycle from which you cannot escape. Instead, by better understanding the information conveyed by these emotions and reevaluating how to find meaning and goals in life, it is possible for us to gradually recover.
