Can’t stop chatting gossip? Can’t stop scrolling through your phone? Overeating, impulse shopping, procrastination addiction…
Have you fallen for these daily “soft addictions”?
American psychologist Judith Wright defines some seemingly harmless habits, compulsive behaviors, or emotions in life as “soft addictions.”
Everyone has more or less “soft addictions” in life, these seemingly irrelevant “soft addictions” may provide temporary satisfaction and pleasure, but unknowingly steal our time, drain our energy, and plunge us into profound emptiness.
Should you surrender to “soft addictions,” or say NO to them? These three steps will help you quickly break free from addiction and regain control of your life.
The first step to overcoming addiction
Behind every habit or behavior, there is always a certain motivation, and “soft addictions” are no exception.
Like many young people, my colleague Xiao Xiao particularly enjoys “window shopping” online. Even without needing to buy anything, she spends a lot of time browsing various online shopping websites every day.
After browsing for half a day, she promises not to buy anything, but can’t resist the temptation, so she keeps buying things. Over time, the low-priced items she hoarded fill up the corners of her home.
When asked by friends why she likes online shopping, Xiao Xiao says that buying things makes her feel relieved, and opening packages makes her happy, as if as long as there is a package on the way, life is full of hope.
The famous psychologist Carl Jung once said, “Our external circumstances are projections of the inner world.”
Whether it’s addiction to online shopping, overeating, or emotional “soft addictions” like inner conflicts and anxiety, behind each “soft addiction” lies some unsatisfied inner demands.
My colleague says she keeps buying things because she feels empty in life, while my friend says his sugar addiction is because he desires more sweetness in life…
To break free from “soft addictions,” you first need to uncover the reasons behind them.
What is your “soft addiction”? What reasons lead you into addiction? What hidden inner desires lie behind the “soft addictions”?
Only by identifying the root causes behind “soft addictions” can you see through superficial desires, uncover your true inner desires, and address them effectively.
Engage in healthier, more positive, and meaningful activities to take care of your emotions, comfort yourself, rather than indulging in shallow, false happiness.
The second step to breaking addiction
Everyone’s life revolves around a core decision. The core decision is like a shining lighthouse, guiding you in times of confusion, directing your life’s course.
My cousin used to suffer from a series of diseases due to obesity. For her health, the doctor recommended weight loss. So, she started losing weight frantically, and even after her weight returned to a normal range, she became addicted to losing weight.
Not only did she exercise excessively every day, but she also strictly controlled her food intake, counting calories for breakfast and lunch, simply skipping dinner.
Due to insufficient carbohydrates, she always had insomnia at night, and worse still, she was diagnosed with chronic enteritis, leaving her feeling weak and completely drained of her former vitality.
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Following the doctor’s advice, my cousin realized that the harm of being addicted to weight loss was greater, so she recalled her original core decision: to become healthy.
She decided to stop losing weight and instead use scientific methods to improve her health.
She reduced excessive exercise, paid attention to a balanced diet, used her spare time to try things she had never done before – dancing, flower arranging, and even studying insects…
A healthy and disciplined lifestyle made my cousin healthier, and her new ventures made her radiant and full of vitality.
The core decision is a prerequisite for breaking free from “soft addictions.”
Whether it’s focusing on family, striving for a career, or gardening, listening to the rhythms of nature. Once you make your core decision, your confidence will soar, and you will face difficulties with a positive mindset of “I can and I will,” concentrating on fulfilling your core decision.
When you center your life around your core decision, you naturally won’t have time for those irrelevant “soft addictions.”
As stated in “Cognitive Awakening,” when you change your thoughts, you change the world.
If you don’t want to be trapped in the fortress of “soft addictions,” living a haphazard life, speak out loud about your core decision!
The third step to breaking addiction
Overcoming “soft addictions” doesn’t mean you have to stay away from TV, phones, or your favorite coffee beverages for the rest of your life. It means designing a fulfilling and satisfying life that nurtures your body, mind, and spirit.
Once you understand the reasons behind “soft addictions” and make your core decision, you can design the enriching life you desire through lifestyle adjustments.
You can refer to the following checklist to add some options to your life:
1. Increase self-care: incorporate regular routines, healthy eating, moderate exercise, activities that truly bring you joy, or special activities that help you vent out your emotions.
2. Enhance personal strength and self-expression: encourage yourself, boost your confidence, acknowledge your talents, boldly pursue what you want, and reject what you don’t want.
3. Increase intimacy: strengthen bonds with yourself, family, and friends.
4. Increase self-improvement: dedicate time to sharpen your skills long-term, learn from exemplary individuals, cultivate hobbies, continue reading, and engage in experiencing life.
Of course, while adding elements to enhance your life, you also need to eliminate things or “soft addictions” that keep you addicted, negative, or hinder your progress.
For example, reduce late-night TV watching or internet surfing, organize your messy living room or bedroom, clear your mind of self-deprecating thoughts at present, or excuses you make to justify your “soft addictions”…
Great ideas only become truly magnificent when put into action.
It’s time to take action. Based on your actual situation, guided by your core decision, make lifestyle adjustments to construct a fulfilling life that truly suits you.
Conclusion
Krishnamurti’s “The First and Last Freedom” says, “Filling oneself with various things does not lead to self-redemption; it is illusory, giving oneself the illusion of being fulfilled and meaningful.”
The more immersed in base pleasures, the easier it is to ruin one’s own life.
Don’t let that “soft addiction” guy frequent your life anymore; find it, expose it; and make a firm decision to drive it away, incorporate more positive, meaningful activities, and embark on a different rich and fulfilling life.
