A heart can withstand waiting, but not hurt.
It is said that the gratitude of a married couple lasts a hundred days, and the relationship of a hundred-day couple is as deep as the sea, but even the deepest affection cannot withstand hurt.
Although conflicts and contradictions are inevitable in relationships, there are some things that should never be done because they deeply hurt a woman’s heart.
Those hurts are like a sudden drenching of cold water, once extinguishing a woman’s love and passion, the relationship becomes precarious.
What a woman desires most is a man’s love. If a man does something that hurts her heart and shatters it, even if he apologizes and makes amends afterward, the scar will still occasionally remind the woman of the hurt she once endured.
If a man fails to realize the severity of the problem and instead blames the woman for being unreasonable or not gentle enough, he is undoubtedly rubbing salt on the woman’s wound, making it difficult to recover.
In fact, in marital relationships, the following actions by a man hurt a wife’s heart the most.
1. Calculating.
It is said that capable men calculate wealth, status, and fame in the external world, while incapable men calculate the women around them.
Due to different cognitive and moral foundations, some men treat their wives as their appendages in marriage, enjoying their wives’ contributions while at the same time calculating their wives’ benefits.
They believe their schemes are discreet, unaware that their wives, out of excessive love, chose to trust them and did not think of the worst in the men. Additionally, women consider themselves as part of the marital unity, sacrificing for children and family without complaining, but that does not mean they are naive.
Men’s calculating ways towards women, such as controlling them economically by not allowing them to have much money, turning women into appendages dependent on them, followed by disdain and suppression, serve to dominate women.
This kind of calculation reflects a man’s callousness; he exploits the wife’s value under the guise of acting in her best interest. Once the wife loses her value, she will be abandoned.
Because such men only see benefits and calculations in their eyes, they never genuinely love their wives. From courtship to marriage, everything is part of their calculation, willing to use any means to achieve their goals.
2. Betrayal and Deception.
Loyalty and trust are crucial in marital relationships; they are the foundation of intimacy. However, some men choose to betray their wives in marriage, pursuing what they desire outside without considering their wives’ feelings. Once discovered, everything the wife had stood for will crumble, leaving her heartbroken.
Many men do not see their actions as wrong; instead, they tend to shift the blame for their betrayal onto their wives, trying to rationalize their actions.
Men’s betrayal destroys trust between the two, while deception makes women feel painful and untrusted, realizing that they are being treated as strangers or insignificant. This will utterly chill the wife’s heart.
Betrayal and deception will create distance and suspicion in a marriage. Every man’s betrayal and deception is a blade piercing a woman’s heart, making her deeply wounded, while the man remains indifferent, feeling that as long as there is no divorce, he is doing his wife a favor, which is an audacious deception. The wife may retaliate or reduce emotional investment.
3. Disdain and Indifference.
In marriage, some men always feel superior, wanting to demean their wives while enjoying their wives’ efforts. When the wife still loves or compromises for the children, she might choose patience and tolerance. Yet, being consistently despised and suppressed, women tend to internalize the belief that their inadequacy is why they fail to receive the man’s love and appreciation, causing deep hurt.
Because of affection and love, a man’s disdain becomes a hurtful weapon striking the woman’s most sensitive spot, leading her to doubt life without ever doubting the man’s intent to belittle her.
Women exhibiting these traits are soft-hearted, seeking fault within themselves when problems arise, being overly dependent on men’s judgment. Confronted with a man’s disdain and indifference, they feel undervalued or abandoned.
A man’s disdain and indifference make a woman feel sad and helpless, not understanding what she did wrong to warrant such treatment from him.
Enduring long-term disdain and indifference from men, women feel unloved, suffering to the point of depression.
The relationship between spouses is built on mutual understanding, respect, and support.
However, men engaging in the abovementioned three actions often hurt their wives deeply.
Truly wise men understand the unity of marriage and treat their wives well because harming a spouse is like emptying a hundred treasures.
Hence, men should avoid actions that hurt their wives, as once the heart cools, it’s challenging to rekindle, and no one will wait for you indefinitely in one place.
A capable man will respect a woman’s feelings, understand her needs, safeguard the family with her, and create a happy future together.
END
Today’s topic: What do you think is the most hurtful behavior of men towards others? Feel free to leave comments for discussion.
