I heard that there is another friend who has cancer around me. I was not surprised by her illness because her family relationships have always been bad.
The suffering, depression, and pain endured in the family will be deposited in the body. Your brain may temporarily forget, but your body will always remember.
All diseases in the world are immune system failures.
01
All grievances, entanglements, and anger
Will eventually turn into an immune storm
In the realm known to Western medicine, there are still many sudden-onset diseases whose specific triggering reasons are unknown. Why do modern people tend to suffer from various illnesses more easily? Is it because they do not pay attention to their health?
No!
Many people spare no effort and money on health preservation, but this idea simply regards the body as a machine, forgetting the unity of body, mind, and spirit.
There was a lady who suddenly developed advanced lung cancer. After marriage, she had always lived with her in-laws.
Although her husband’s family treated her well, she really hoped to have her own space. She had mentioned a few times to her husband about wanting to move out of her in-laws’ house, but her requests were always rejected. Eventually, she stopped mentioning it.
It wasn’t until last year, when she was diagnosed with lung cancer without any warning signs, that it was already in the advanced stage.
Her family was financially well-off. In addition to receiving treatment from Western medicine, her family also arranged for a renowned psychotherapist to help her. During one hypnotherapy session, the psychotherapist asked her about her biggest wish in life.
She only said one thing:
“I hope to have a home of my own, living only with my husband and children, not too big, not for a long time, just a few months would be enough.”
She calmly expressed her wish, with a faint smile appearing on her lips, unnoticed even by herself.
People only like good emotions, such as happiness, and suppress negative emotions like sadness and fear.
We do not know that grievances, oppression, stress, all accumulate in the body, and one day, an immune storm can take a person’s life.
02
We have long underestimated the wisdom of the body
The human body has a sophisticated immune system
When we experience various emotions, the immune system is the first to be attacked.
Over 70% of people digest their emotions in a way that attacks their own bodily organs, which is one of the biggest reasons for the onset of illnesses.
Different emotions will attack different organs; ancient Chinese medicine wisdom proposes: the kidneys govern fear, the liver stores anger, the lungs contain sorrow…
In addition, physical strain and stress mostly trigger gastrointestinal diseases, while feelings of dissatisfaction and excessive ambition lead to migraines. Indecisive and lacking in confidence individuals are often labeled with diabetes.
Take women, for example: suppressed anger easily leads to breast hyperplasia, long-term accumulation tends to cause breast cancer, neglecting one’s female identity affects ovarian health and menstrual irregularities, and marital discord intertwines with gynecological diseases.
Research indicates that the top seven emotions that disrupt the immune system are, in order: anger, sadness, fear, depression, hostility, suspicion, and seasonal instability (such as frequent disputes and friction in summer, and increased depression in winter).
There was an experiment:
A monkey was suspended and periodically given electric shocks, keeping the monkey in a state of anxiety. Before long, the monkey developed gastric ulcers.
Through the use of gastrointestinal endoscopes, X-rays, electroencephalograms, and biological studies on the pathology of gastric diseases, it was found that the occurrence of gastric diseases is closely related to excessive excitatory or inhibitory activities in the cerebral cortex and dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system.
When experiencing symptoms like skin allergies, throat discomfort, stomach pain, ulcers, insomnia, excessive dreaming, and frequent headaches, we often think: is something wrong with our bodies?
Many times, it is actually chronic negative emotions that are the hidden culprits behind these symptoms.
03
Physical discomfort and illnesses
Are cries for help from within
Last night, a friend and I had a late-night conversation where we discussed a chapter in my new course on emotions and diseases, and he was very interested.
He asked me: what emotions might have caused my younger brother to have premature gray hair?
I replied: it might be “I have already tried my best.”
He asked: how to relieve it?
I answered: be yourself, return other people’s wishes to them.
He nodded and asked again: was my father’s overnight gray hair on the night my mother passed away due to emotions?
I said: yes, it was due to excessive sadness and despair.
He asked: what might be the reason for my recent unexplained hair loss?
I replied: anxiety.
He said: I don’t want to be anxious either, but “I can’t help it!”
I said: why worry about the future? Live in the present.
Do not ignore the deep wounds hidden beneath these emotions.
We often say “it’s killing me,” “the pressure is too high,” “feeling resentful,” indicating that emotions are at play.
Anger makes one feel out of control, automatically releasing harmful factors for the respiratory system;
Anxiety puts the body in a state of burning without firewood, slowly wearing down a person’s mental strength;
Pressure leads to despondency, like an invisible hand covering one’s nose, seeing the fingers through a grey sky but unable to touch them.
Anger makes one feel out of control, automatically releasing harmful factors for the respiratory system;
Anxiety puts the body in a state of burning without firewood, slowly wearing down a person’s mental strength;
Pressure leads to despondency, like an invisible hand covering one’s nose, seeing the fingers through a grey sky but unable to touch them.
The body does not lie; it faithfully stores all emotions for us, and getting sick is a reminder that we need to face our true needs, handle them properly, and trust in the body’s ability.
04
Healing cannot be just about treating the disease
Discover where the ailments lie
When the stomach feels uncomfortable, simply taking stomach medicine without addressing the roots of stress and tension; when various red rashes appear on the skin like erupting little volcanoes, without expressing: “I am angry, please pay attention to my furious heart.”
Many diseases are caused by our own emotions; even if one seems to recover a bit, when emotions resurface, health disappears again.
A friend suffered from severe pelvic inflammatory disease that could not be cured for a long time. She contracted the disease after her ex-husband had an affair, which was her body’s way of saying, “I will not be with someone who betrays me again!”
Fortunately, after divorcing and finding someone who truly loved her, combined with appropriate care and treatment, she recovered from the illness long ago.
As ancient sayings go: “The sickness of the mind requires medicine for the heart.” As I type out this sharing on my keyboard, a friend happens to visit my place.
He asked me: are emotions related to gout?
I answered: yes.
He asked: what kind of emotion?
I said: self-destructive behavior.
He asked: what is the significance of gout for the body?
I said: only unbearable pain can remind oneself that they are still alive.
He said: no wonder I suddenly had gout a few years ago.
Even after taking some medicine, there was no improvement. That year, I had just lost my job and stayed at home, hesitating and unwilling to take action. It wasn’t until I returned to work last year that the disease miraculously disappeared. One of my doctor friends said:
Among the patients who now visit the hospital, more than a third have psychosomatic illnesses, while physical illnesses are less than a third, and physical ailments can lead to psychological problems.
Hence, they can no longer rely solely on a biomedical model to treat these patients, but should address treatment from all three levels: biological, psychological, and social.
When you reach a critical point of fatigue, you need to rest;
When an illness is still in its early stages, you need to manage your immune system;
When you need to cry and scream, when you should let go and forgive;
When it is time to be bold and confident…
When you reach a critical point of fatigue, you need to rest;
When an illness is still in its early stages, you need to manage your immune system;
When you need to cry and scream, when you should let go and forgive;
When it is time to be bold and confident…
You must be the one who knows exactly where your emotions and body stand, and then digest them.
Therefore, understanding self-love is not just about living in the best house, eating the most exquisite meals, being true to oneself, transcending oneself, but it is about being more attentive to your emotions than anyone else and more sensitive to the signals your body sends out.
05
When in a bad mood, try this happiness
Modern people often complain about living a bitter, tiring life, and a significant reason is often that they magnify their troubles, wallow in a bit of misery and negative emotions, leading to an inescapable situation.
Perhaps this is the root of your unhappiness.
To study common concerns and struggles, psychologists conducted an interesting experiment:
Participants were asked to write down all their “worries” and “concerns” for the following seven days on a Sunday evening, and then place them in a designated “worry box.” After three weeks, psychologists opened the “worry box.”
The results showed that ninety percent of the “concerns” did not actually happen.
From this, it is evident that many worries are self-imposed, also known as “borrowed worries”!
A person’s level of happiness is not determined by how much they possess but by how they choose to view life. A pessimistic person, even with immense wealth, will still be restless every day;
an optimistic person, even without a penny, can still enjoy the clear sky and bright moon.
We must learn to come out of the misconception of magnifying troubles:
First, understand the objectivity of pain and setbacks.
Encountering setbacks is a very normal occurrence; things like a breakup, being laid off, receiving criticism from a boss, all such things are part of life.
Second, try to find the psychological reasons behind magnifying troubles,
Ask yourself if you are excessively pursuing perfection, placing too much emphasis on outcomes, or highly valuing others’ opinions. These attitudes often show that you tend to view yourself pessimistically, focusing on magnifying your flaws.
Third, confront the reality of stress.
The emergence of distress often stems from some real-life pressures and psychological conflicts, such as marital conflicts, work pressure, interpersonal conflicts, etc. We must learn to face and resolve them in a timely manner.
Fourth, find sources of happiness through various means to enrich and fill your life.
Waking up to good weather in the morning, receiving praise from a supervisor at work, coming home without traffic jams, receiving an e-card from someone, reminiscing about a funny childhood memory… these are all reasons for our happiness and joy!
Finally, I hope that all friends can find the sources of their happiness, stay away from negative emotions, and have a healthy body and mind!
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